I was once arrested outside of the hotel after a fraternity rush party featuring Howling Wolf.... for not wearing socks. I wound up spending the night in jail. Later in court, the judge allowed me to question the police officer on why I had been stopped. He had seen me driving erratically, the officer said, and when I got out of the car he noticed two things: I smelled like alcohol and I was not wearing socks.

It was a class issue. The police officer didn't know that Ole Miss fraternity boys wore their Weejuns without socks. The judge, of course, knew immediately, and urged me to go on with my questions. "And so", I said, "didn't you have a dog with you that night?"

"Yes" the officer said.

"And wasn't the dog on a leash?"

"Yes", the officer said.

"And how long is the dog and leash combined?" I grilled the cop.

"Maybe 6 feet, maybe 7 feet", said the hapless cop.

"And you smelled the alcohol from 7 to 10 feet?"

"Yes", said the cop.

"Am I wearing a deoderant now?"

"I don't know", said the cop.

"Dismissed!" said the judge.

True story.